we meet again jisoo. i feel so unmotivated right now but thanks to you, you make everything better because of that smile.

i don't know what i'm thinking right now. my exam is less than a week. no, less than 4 days. can you believe that? the biggest exam of my life. and i need to make sure that i did a great job and end up getting great results to make my parents proud, to be the only child in my family that can actually score an all A's for a big exam. and frankly speaking, i feel so damn pressured.

yes i feel like there's a rope, tied tightly and gripping my head hard. so hard that it can burst anytime. and i feel like it's really going to burst.

jisoo do you know that feeling when you tried your best, your very best. you memorized everything perfectly, you practice and practice. and you spend your whole life working hard for it. and at the end of the day, you forget it all. you panicked because you are too nervous- too nervous that your head went blank and everything that you worked so hard for is ditched inside the trash. 

i feel so confident that i can score every question correctly and even got perfect marks for it. but turns out, everything is wrong. because of what? because i'm too nervous. too nervous to face it. and my brain feels so weak that i can't think of anything. i did it halfheartedly and don't feel like doing it at all. i need some motivations, something that can light up my brain and make me enjoy doing it. i need those so bad. but where can i find it? help me. i just want to study without any worries. can i actually do this, hm? 

i can. i'm sure i can. i'll work hard. i can do this!!!!

wish me luck, joshua. i'm going to make myself proud. and most importantly, to make my parents proud.